Frenemy: A High School Tale

Sometimes I think too much.  Lately I’ve been thinking about friendships.  I don’t really have any friends and I used to think it was because no one liked me. But the truth is, I’m a bit standoffish. I don’t go out of my way to make friends.  I feel awkward and wierd trying to talk to new people.  I think the reason behind some of that is the fact that the few close friends I’ve had have used me or were never friends at all. Case in point. I was friends with a girl in jr high and I am not sure why I ever considered her a friend, much less my best friend. She always made fun of me, convinced other girls to bully me, and sabatoged relationships I had.

For instance, she insisted I date a male friend of hers when we were in 10th grade.  I didn’t really know him but she kept on and on until I finally agreed.  He and I went on one date.  He was ok. Nothing to write home about.  But I decided to give him a chance.  He was not the best looking guy, but I know looks aren’t everything.  I wanted to get to know him. A few days later, he called me and said that he didn’t want to go out with me anymore (remember, we had only been on 1 date lol) because someone had basically told him I was stupid and didn’t have any sense. The funny thing about that is, he went to a different school than I did and the only person we had in common was my friend. He had given me this cheap necklace for my birthday and asked me to give it to our friend so she could bring it to him. I didn’t care. It was probably fake anyway. So I gave the necklace to my friend and the next day, she comes to school wearing the necklace!  I’m not an idiot so I point blank asked her, “Are you and F going out now?”  She looked me right in my face and told me “no”. I left it at that.

The next day before class, she hands a note to me and walks away. No big deal. We wrote letters to each other every day. This was before cellphones and messenger of course. In the letter she apologized saying she was sorry she lied but that she and F. were dating.  I was infuriated. Not because she was going out with him. I wasn’t angry over that. I had only went out with him once so it wasn’t as if I was that invested in the relationship anyway. No, I was livid because she lied to me. To my face. This resulted in us not speaking for several weeks. I even threatened to fight her. I know, immature on my part, but I was only 16. The guy ended up calling me, threatening me to leave her alone or else.  That didn’t surprise me. It was so like her to get other people to do things like that.  I never fought her and after a couple of weeks,she and F. stopped going out. We started speaking again.  This was not the first time she sabatoged a relationship. I could write a book on all the stuff my supposed best friend did to me over the years.

We haven’t spoken for about 2 years. It’s a vicious cycle. I will contact her, we’ll start talking again, and then all of a sudden she stops speaking to me and blocks me on social media. Sometimes I know why and sometimes I don’t.  I have just gotten to the point where I refuse to beg her to be my friend. The story I told on the blog today was just one of the many lousy things she has done to me.  The thing is, I have no clue why I stayed friends with her for so long. It’s not like I didn’t have other friends. I did.  But she was my best friend. She was my go to person when I needed to talk. But she was never really there for me. She was what I refer to as a frenemy. I think for whatever reason, she stayed friends with me just so she could bring me down.  Maybe it made her feel better about herself, I don’t know.

I don’t think there’s a moral to this story except maybe if someone intentionally does things to hurt you over and over again, then maybe they aren’t your friend. I’ve tried to instill this in my kids. I’ve told them they need to pick quality people to be their friends. Be picky about who you give attention to. My kids have done so much better with picking friends than I did.

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Giving Gifts in 2018

Giving gifts as an adult gets more and more difficult. As you and your friends start to grow your disposable income, you have the freedom to buy for yourself the things that would normally have to wait to be gifts. When birthdays, Christmas and other events from housewarming to Valentine’s Day roll around, it can leave you in quandary: what to get for the person who has everything?

Today we’re inspiring you with a few ideas for original gifts to give in 2018, so you’ll be everyone’s favourite friend.

Luxury

One way to give a fantastic gift that will keep on giving is to pick an aspect of your friend or partner’s life and inject a little luxury into it. Life is gruelling, and with the UK working longer and longer hours transforming the more routine parts of life into luxurious treats is a great way to claw back some ‘me-time’.

Pick a part of your friend’s life you know they value and think about how to make a little more special. If they value their grooming, a gift of some luxury aftershave is thoughtful and is something that will make them think of you every time they get ready to impress!

For the friend that loves a cup of coffee in the morning, you have plenty of options, from coffee subscriptions that will give them an exciting new flavour each week, to new coffee gizmos and accessories like the Aeropress!

Experiences

The gift you can guarantee a friend won’t have is a unique experience! Even if it’s something they’ve done before, treating them to hot air ballooning, or sports car driving is a treat they’ll be happy to revisit.

Of course, you’ll have to do a bit of research and careful though to fit the experience to the friend. Buying a flying lesson for some who suffers from crippling vertigo isn’t much of a present at all. If you want to give the gift of an experience, or tickets for something, but you’re not certain what would be a good fit, try talking to partners or family – find something they’ve always wanted to do but haven’t been able to, or something they love.

If it’s suitable for two, going with them is a great way to spend some quality time with a friend, and show them you really care. If you’ve treated them to theatre tickets, then buying dinner or some interval drinks is another little bonus present that makes the evening truly special for them!

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Snow Day 2017

I hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year’s Day.  We actually had a pretty cold December. We even got snow on the 8th. Of course, this is the south so it was all gone by the 3rd day.  It never stays cold enough for the snow to stay any longer than a day or so.  But the kids had fun playing in it.  I took a lot of photos which I haven’t even finished editing yet.  I have a few I can share though.

Holly berries
Trail to the barn at my sister’s house
Across the road from my house
Old barn at my sister’s house

 

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Win over $870 Worth of Prizes!

Who is ready for a MASSIVE kids themed giveaway?!

 

It’s MamatheFox’s 2017 Annual Holiday Gift Guide – Kids Prize Giveaway

 

Enter to win $870+ in kids prizes from various sponsors

24 prizes all to one winner!

 

Open to US only ? Must be 18+ to enter

Here is what (1) lucky winner will receive:

 

MamatheFox and all participating blogs are not held responsible for sponsors who fail to fulfill their prize obligations

If you would like to participate as a blogger or a sponsor in an event like this please contact Danielle at mamathefox@gmail.com

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